Lawyer versus Lawyer

Folks, if the marriage is over, divide up the stuff based on who it "belongs" to.
The stuff that is disputed, put into a pile or on a list. Separate the agreed on stuff. Work out a way to divide the disputed stuff. Being around each other long enough to get it done may take a few days depending on how much stuff is involved but its one of those things in life where you just do what you got to do and get it done.

The ugly alternative is to have a lawyer file an injunction, change the locks, and leave it all in limbo till a judge orders it done/sold. In the end, the division of stuff is complete either way, one way just costs ALOT MORE and kinda stupid.

Imagine coming in from a hard week at work, made much harder by your partner "taking some time off"...and finding you can't get back into your house to get even your most basic stuff. Then going to your storage building so you can at least unload your car from the trip but finding a lock had been put on it too...and then going to the bank to get your paycheck so you can at least buy some underwear and clothes but finding that a check had been written that would have cleaned out the entire account transferring it to someone elses account, including even your own paycheck...you'd be thankful it hadn't cleared yet so you at least had a chance to get your check.

Yet most of that ends up going to pay a lawyer to protect you from further devastation...and the wait begins for your lawyer to talk her lawyer into talking her into letting the personal property be peacefully exchanged.

Well, I'm still waiting for that to happen...and busy trying to find a place to rent that will be big enough to also move in my disabled brother since the injunction orders also specifically included a clause that evicts him from his little house on the place.

As far as work goes, I'll probably have to find something within a couple weeks...should have that long providing my remaining checks coming in don't get stolen. Finding work with 84% hearing loss in both ears isn't easy, profitable work that is. I did actually file for SSDI and have an appointment on the 9th about that. Meanwhile tomorrow I meet with a real ENT and an Audiologist to see if there is ANY type of hearing aid that will work to enable me to understand the noise around me. So far they just make garble louder. If you want to understand hearing loss, try understanding this posting without the consonants...that leaves the a,e,i,o,u and some vague guesses as to what went with them.

If they can get me where I can have meaningful employment, great. If not, then hopefully I can get the SSDI approved and find at least something to keep the bills paid between now. Something I can do without endangering myself or others by not hearing stuff a worker should hear and be warned by.

So life is busy. The vengeful hurtful response to the ending of the marriage is painful but not as painful as staying in it would have been in the long run.
Yes it has made life very challenging and kept me very busy trying to figure out solutions to problems..and trying to figure what problems existed and needed handled that I didn't yet see.

It was really weird to me that sitting in the Social Security office in the interview my eyes just kept filling with tears...I think because I was finally accepting the fact that a part of me was damaged for life and though I've worked since I was in my early teens...I wasn't fitting in in the workplace anymore. Its like mourning/grieving that a part of me was dead and gone.

I'm optimistic though that the painful changes in my journey are like the painful pulling of bothersome teeth...the dentist office isn't pleasant but afterwards it leads to a better life than ever before.

Maybe tomorrow, when I have the other lock removed from my storage and can start getting things ready for exchange, as well as unloading my car..that will help.

Maybe tomorrow at the ear doc I can get good news, one way or another.

Maybe tomorrow in my apartment/house search I can find something that will work great for us all.

Maybe tomorrow my lawyer will call and tell me her lawyer is in agreement and we can begin a peaceful exchange of property...and no further lawyer fees are going to need paid.

Maybe tomorrow my little brother will have a good day. I've tried keeping him reassured that all was going to be just fine...but with his mental disabilities its a challenge. Hopefully tomorrow I can get him an appointment made with a doc that can help him with his anxiety/coping thru all this commotion.

So much to do, so few resources, so many obstacles. My friend's advice has helped me overcome the overwhelmingness of it all...step where you need to step, hop what you need to hop, jump what you need to jump, and you'll get thru it.

Ok, long post, but covered a busy week. Each day I awake with fresh new excitement about all the possible things that could go really right.